21 January 2015

AHA! Parenting pennies dropping like crazy!

Welcome Peabodies.

I read an article to day that gave me a HUGE parental AHA! moment.

Let me start this blog post by giving you a little bit of context..

I often get told, and I mean often, several times a day actually - that my children are really well behaved.

Yes! Thinks me - Then I give myself and the Husbeast a little pat on the back. 
A mental high five.

We have high expectations, of and for, our girls and they meet them the majority of the time. They are good girls.
The very next thought however that comes into my head after the pat on the back is - they are good because I yell at them and nag them all the time. 
I am on their case 
All. the. time.

In fact sometimes it keeps me up at night that I nag them too much.

I have been accused of being a tough mamma. “You're hard on your kids” I've been told by both family and friends
 And I wear that badge with pride. Don't get me wrong, I'm no 'Tiger Mom'. I'm more of a 'Lynx Mum'. Smaller than a tiger but still a wild animal - no domesticated puss here!

But I do know I yell too much. 
And I know I get better results when I don't yell.

So if the girls behave even better when I'm not yelling - why do I yell? 
I don't know why.
I couldn't tell you.

One of my resolutions for 2015 is to yell less at the kids and to slow down and enjoy their childhood more.

Then the other day this blog post  from Hands Free Mama came across my facebook timeline and I took the time to read it.

You too should take the time to read it.

I am my response.

Those words really resonated with me.

You are your response.

I've read many other parenting-esque articles like this with a similar message and always I've thought " yeah yeah I yell at my kids too much ......I know....."

I'm not sure why these particular words stuck a chord, but strummed they did!

I am my response.

I'm thinking of getting that tattooed somewhere……… 

Perhaps I'll just make a poster!

Lately over the last 2 years or so I've been getting grumpy at the the kids and and the Husbeast for no good reason, I won't say no reason because there's always a reason
 (lets face it ladies.....) 
But lately I've been asking myself  'is it worth getting grumpy?'
So what if the bin is full again. I'll just take it out.
So what if it takes an extra 5 minutes to put on the girls shoes?
I'll enjoy that extra 5 minutes with my kids. 
So what?
So what?
So what?

Does it all matter at the end of the day?

Once the end of the day approaches and the girls are in bed I certainly don't think - 'gee whizz I wish Miss L would get in the car quicker'

 Often once the girls are in bed my thoughts are of regret.
Regret that I hurried her because of my own disorganisation.
Regret that I yelled because she stopped to look at ….. the sky, that dog, that toy, that snail.
All of my own doing. All from my own pressure.

Lighter and Brighter.
I am my response.

Two mantras for me for 2015.
I'll keep you updated though the year with how I am going.

Are you a yeller?
Are you a Tiger Mom?
I’d love to hear your parenting Aha! moments Peabodies! Share them below.

Peas out.



  1. Thank you for sharing a link to that article- very powerful indeed and I can certainly relate. I really dig your writing style!

    1. Thankyou Dawn! And thank you for taking the time to read my Blog! Its nice to know sometimes we aren't alone isn't it?

  2. Hi Jane - I hear you (and not because you were yelling). I am definitely a yeller - and all six of our children would very quickly agree with me! Like you , I know I yell far too much and that I am likely to get a better response if I don't yell, but yell I do. But, also like you we have always had people tell us how well behaved our children are - they have always been home devils and street angels and we have come to accept that that is ok.

    1. And you know Pinkknits - It really is Ok. I bet you're kids are happy even if you do yell a bit! And if your kids are street angles then I think your doing an awesome job!! Thanks for taking the time to read and comment!

  3. Every time I yell at my kids, I am overwhelmed with guilt the next second. It never helps, but it can do a lot of damage. I'm grateful that they are patient and forgiving with me. I think we just get so exhausted and overwhelmed... that's a reason not an excuse. I need to let go!

    1. Hi Naomi - I feel overwhelmed with guilt a lot when it comes to my kids and yelling. It certainly is a good reason and being tired and exhausted can have all sorts of effects on our lives! As mammas we need to take care of ourselves too! thanks for commenting! and I bet your kids are awesome!

  4. Great post Jane, I am going to read the one at Hands Free Mama too. I am a yeller even though I know it makes no sense. Like Naomi, I shout then feel bad.

  5. Thank you Clare! It's a hard job this parenting gig, isn't it? I hope that the post at Hands free Mama helps you as it helped me!
    Thanks for taking the time to comment ! It can be hard to find that time so I really appreciate it!